I’m A Golden Man: Bappi Lahiri

I just had to write a post about this historical, and hysterical interview with Koel. I watched this show on a Kingfisher flight and trust me, it was the best flight I had ever taken in my life. I watched 3 reruns of this show and favorited it on YouTube as well. This is for your entertainment. All spelling mistakes were on purpose and as per the vocabulary of Bappi Da 🙂

He was called Alokesh before he became ‘famous Master Baapi’ at the age of 4 because he was playing “classical tabla”, but “he don’t know when I am playing tabla” because his “mamma and his dads told me that you’re so small so the crawling that time you want the tabla baaya like” Oh – he is also a “pianoist”.

He agrees that either it is an exaggeration or that he is a child prodigy. – not clear from his statement.

He loves crooning, preferably his own songs.

He was not allowed to play cricket as a kid because his “finger will fracture”

He was given a “B” gold chain because he was “famous B”

He wore his first gold chain that was gifted to him by his ‘Mamma’ and “my Zakhmi became sooper heet”

He was a “follower” and “a practical fan of Elvis Presley with his round face” and that is why the fact that he was talented or his music evolved over time did not play a factor in his success as a music director.

He was a “brand brand I’m brand” before becoming a brand and all over the world he is known as “Bling Bling Bappi Lahiri”

Obviously, he gloats, “I’m A Golden Man”

He got Disco to Indian movies and croons out the number as well. Surprisingly, he says that ‘Chalte Chalte’ the title track is also a disco song, followed by ‘Pyaar Manga Hai Tumhi Se’

In his famous American accent, he tells us how he learnt in an American club the word ‘disco’ originated. “No No No Disc playing – Disco – you understand?” That’s what gave him the “correct words – Disco”.

The director of Mithun’s first blockbuster told him that he wants songs like “John Travolta, Bee Gees, with some Kungfu flavor”, which is when he asked himself “How I will do?” and answers “OK, I will do”. He then explains how Bruce Lee was so famous and almost says that he sang for Bruce Lee. The song was “mausam hai jeene ka …. grandmaster jeena” ??? Obviously, the song became a “sooper heet”.

When Koel says that the song “I am a Disco Dancer” is a cult song, he forcefully says “All Songs!!!” Koel acquiesces.

Disco Dancer is actually “a history” because it’s being used in a movie called “Don’t Mess With The Zohaan with Adam Sand Lear” for using “Jimmy Jimmy”.

He agrees that he borrowed from the West, but adds that he took “in 500 song 2 song and not like today’s every song is plagarees”. He also gives the example how “anyone can borrow Beyonce’s song – touch me touch me touch me, touch me touch me touch me”

He flatters Koel by telling her that she is a star and that “everywhere this program is a soopper hit – couch”

He says he is the seniormost composer in the Hindi “fillum” industry like Lakshmikant Pyarelal, RD Burman, and Kalyanji Bhai. Asking him to compose with 2/3 other composers for the same “fillum” was a terrible insult to him, which is why he thought that he should go to Hollywood, where he worked hard for 2 years on “kaliyon ka chaman”, which was in the top 3 of the American charts.

You will see him next in “a very beeg role with Salman Khan in Main Aur Mrs. Khanna” where he has also “sang a song”. He plays a “very beeg myujikal-minded taicoon of Australia”.

His latest music album (My Love) is “bhery secret” dedication to someone, for which he also has to “cross feenger”.

He was a “teenagers” even when he was 23 when he married his wife.

Bappa, his son is “comeeng out very well” now and his 3rd “peecture is beecom very beeg heet”.

He didn’t participate in this year’s general elections because he was “beezee in talent hunt show – international talent hunt show – fool month beezee”. However, he gives his “laav and respect to Congress”.

Bappi Da does not have “alcohol, pan, pan parag, no nothing. No addictation”.

To his critics, “No No. anybody’s telling me bad accent. That is why I am sitting here in golden – uh red couch, 36 years in Bollywood and everybody loves Bappil Lahiri. I want lao of junta and I want to be good human. Bappi Lahiri should be good human personality because you know I want to sing…” and there he breaks into yet another song.

His dream is to get “Grammy avaard”.
His most humbling moment was in London when he met “Bittles group – that Paul, that John Ringo Paul”….” and adds when asked if he met the whole group, “not whole group, uh – that Paul Mackton.”
Michael Jackson (RIP) met Bappi and asked him for his “Ganpati Baba chain”

He then gets reminiscent about getting Samantha Fox in Rock Dancer for “Touch Me, Touch Me, I feel your body”, although the film did “not business, not business, but…”.

He can instantly fall in love with “good myoojik”.

His biggest regret is that his parents are “off”.

His latest want is to work with the “latest Beyonce”

…and he signs off in classic style with a Bengali number and shows how he plagiarized it into a Hindi version.


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